PSYCHOTHERAPY
ONLINE FOR RESIDENTS OF CALIFORNIA AND IN-PERSON IN ENCINITAS, CA
My approach —
My approach is a blend of talk therapy, somatic awareness, parts work, EMDR, and a sense of humor to support you as we hold the big stuff.
I work from a relational lens, which means I’ll show up as a present and compassionate human in the room. Creating a space where you can show up exactly as you are — completely unfiltered, messy, human — is what I will always strive for.
Occasionally, I’ll weave embodiment-focused work (mindfulness, breathwork, and gentle movement) into the exploration of your inner world. Honoring the innate wisdom of our bodies means creating safety in the nervous system before diving deeper, making sure we’re safe & steady enough to answer the call.
My work with couples is grounded in an emotion-focused and attachment-based lens. We’ll explore supportive tools (communication skills and conflict mitigation) in tandem with the deeper work of identifying and working with the roots of disconnection (exploring patterns, needs, boundaries, values, and intimacy).
All this being said, therapy is a fluid process of untangling and softening. We won’t stick to the script because there is no script. We’ll find what feels good to you and move gently into that space.
Areas of Specialty
Working with individuals, we are primarily moving through relational healing/relational conflict, anxiety or nervous system dysregulation, self-worth, and entrepreneurship & burnout.
Working with couples, we are primarily re-harnessing connection (emotional and physical), mitigating long-standing conflicts, addressing pre-marital concerns, and navigating co-parenting and divorce.
Education & Training
Master’s in Counseling Psychology, University of Santa Clara
EMDR Basic Training, The EMDR Institute
Somatic Trauma Training, Embody Lab
Active Breathwork Facilitation Certification; Ally Maz & George Ramsey
Advanced Perinatal Training (in progress)
FAQS
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Individual Session: $180
Couple’s Session: $200
While I don’t accept insurance, see the question below to assess potential out-of-network reimbursement. You are also entitled to a good-faith estimate. While therapy does take time, energy, and resources, it’s not a lifelong commitment. I prefer to think about therapy in seasons—perhaps this is a season where you need more support. Throughout our work together, we’ll keep checking in based on your needs..
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I am not in-network with any insurance providers, which means I do not accept insurance. I understand and empathize with the frustration of trying to find high-quality care at an accessible rate. If helpful, below you’ll find additional context for choosing not to accept insurance.
Therapist Burnout
Like many other professionals, psychotherapists are prone to burnout. Working as a therapist is an immense privilege, and must be carefully balanced to prevent burnout and compassion fatigue. When therapists panel with insurance companies, they see a higher volume of clients for lower overall compensation. It’s not a sustainable system for clients or therapists.
Privacy, Confidentiality, and Medical Necessity
While using insurance may make treatment more affordable, there are associated privacy, confidentiality, and treatment limitations. For instance, insurance companies may ask for information about a patient’s mental health diagnosis, symptoms, treatment, and goals. Insurance companies require psychotherapy treatment to be medically necessary and can deny the frequency of treatment or determine that sessions are no longer needed despite your wishes and my advocacy. By not using insurance, you have increased privacy and greater autonomy over the way you wish to engage in treatment. For instance, some people find that participating in long-term therapy or more frequent sessions increases the richness of the therapeutic work.
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Great question! I work with my clients using Mentaya, a platform that helps clients receive reimbursement for out-of-network benefits. Mentaya costs 5% of the session fee (approximately $9) and provides a refund if your claim is denied. Mentaya allows for clients to take advantage of out-of-network benefits without the hassle of dealing with your insurance company. Additionally, you can always see the status of your insurance claims on the platform.
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I do offer a limited number of sliding scale spaces on my caseload. I know that finding high-quality, accessible therapy can be an uphill battle. Sliding scale fees are set based on needs and upheld by an honor system.
At this time, all sliding scale spaces are filled. To be added to the waitlist for the sliding scale, please email me at amy@the-softening.com. If you’d like other referrals, you can reach out and I can provide information.
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This entirely depends on what you want out of therapy. The work of unraveling our narratives, breaking long-standing patterns, regulating our nervous systems, and improving our relationships with ourselves and others is lifelong work, but that doesn’t mean that therapy has to be.
At the start of the therapy, weekly sessions & consistency are important as we build safety and move toward the deep work. As you move, become, and grow closer toward where you want to be, we’ll revisit session cadence and what feels most supportive to you.
